Understanding Our Mental Health

Mental health impacts everyone’s quality of life and includes our passions, relationships, and experiences. Someone can be born with a genetic predisposition for a mental illness. Our brains can also sustain psychological traumas.

Consider the mind like a bottle of soda. Experiences from all aspects of life shake the bottle and build pressure. Healthy self-expression is relieving the pressure build-up without exploding.

We invest a great deal of time formally and informally apprising others on how to address our physical health. For example, if someone had a

broken leg, just about anyone would know to contact medical services. But unlike our physical health, mental health isn’t commonly talked about in our communities because of stigma.

We need to embrace open communication of mental health challenges and be able to provide direction to help others before crisis arises.

There is no shame in asking for help. There are tools and treatments to respond, treat and manage mental health issues.

IT’S OK NOT TO BE OK.

Signs Someone May Need Support

Suicide and self-harm are preventable mental health crises. We can be proactive by recognizing expressions of someone in distress.

A few types of warning signs are:

Someone expressing feelings of being trapped, like there is no way out.
Someone expressing hopelessness or stating no reason for living

Someone withdrawing from family, their friends, or usual activities they like.

Someone talking or threatening to hurt or kill themselves..

These are only a couple of signatures, and there are different ways people exhibit pain.

How To Be Supportive

When someone experiences a mental health challenge, here is how you can be supportive:

LISTEN: Let someone really express their experiences. Being someone they can talk to is essential when giving support.

BE NON-JUDGMENTAL: Don’t criticize or minimize the way they feel. You may not be able to understand exactly what they’re going through, and that’s ok.

ASK WHAT, NOT WHY: When you ask questions, avoid asking ‘why’ questions, and instead ask ‘what’ questions. Asking why can have a judgmental tone even if you don’t mean it that way.

GIVE INFORMATION - DON’T DIAGNOSE: Don’t assume they have an illness or condition. Provide direction to resources that can identify and treat mental health issues.

ACT AS A BRIDGE: You can connect someone to mental health resources. Resources include family, school guidance, mental health professionals, and organizations like H.F.T.D.

TEAMMATE IN SUPPORT: Being supportive doesn’t mean your duty is to ‘fix’ someone. Mental health is complicated and solutions aren’t overnight. As a teammate, the best support you can give is by being a trusting ear, helping to navigate resources, and acting as a source of encouragement.

How To Ask For Help

When you’re experiencing a mental health challenge, here is how you can reach out!
Reflect and recognize the amount of courage it takes to have this conversation in a world full of stigma. Be proud of yourself for taking this step!

WHO TO ASK: Make a list of the people you’re considering! Include the people you feel closest to (parents, guardians, siblings, friends, teachers, partners, etc.). This list could also include hotlines, warmlines, and professionals like therapists or counselors.

HOW TO ASK: Some of the phrases you can say, when reaching out for help include:

I’m struggling with my mental health, and all the coping skills I know aren’t working. Can you help me figure out what to do next?
I’m going through a tough time and I feel like you’re someone I can trust. Are you free to talk [insert day and time]?
I’m going through a stressful time. Can you check in with me on [dates or days] just to make sure I’m alright?

I’m having a hard time taking care of myself. I need extra support around [insert task]. Can you help me out?

I’m not feeling like myself these days. I want to learn some strategies so I can start feeling better. Can you help me with that?
I’m having a rough day or night, but I’m not ready to talk about it. Can you help distract me by [insert activity]?
I don’t want to be alone right now. Can you stay on the phone with me or come over until I calm down?
I am feeling [depressed, anxious, suicidal, etc.]. I’m not sure what to ask for, but I need some help deciding what to do next.

OTHER RESOURCES: Hope For The Day’s Resource Compass is a tool that allows us to search any US Zip Code for a variety of social services in the area, including free & sliding-scale resources for mental health.

You can also access any of these lifelines! Many of them are 24 hours, including the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline and the Crisis Text Line—where you can text with a trained crisis counselor.

Understanding Non Suicidal Self Injury (N.S.S.I.)

Self harm is widely misunderstood and stigmatized by social media, medical professionals, clinicians, teachers, and general society. N.S.S.I. and self harm is often seen as “attention seeking” and “emo”—rather than a complicated coping strategy that should be taken seriously.

Self harm is any behavior used to inflict pain on one’s own body. It’s a coping strategy for emotional distress. Repeated self harm creates an adrenaline rush that often becomes addicting, comforting, and impulsive.

Not necessarily. Many people who self harm often do not intend to attempt suicide. Someone may self harm for years without any desire to die. However, they may cause more harm than they meant to while caught up in the moment—which can result in medical complications or death.

How To Respond When Learning About A Person’s Self Harm:

Remain calm.
Don’t shame the person about their behavior.

Offer care and support (first aid, emotional support, doctor visit, therapist call, etc.)
Invite conversation “You don’t have to talk if you don’t want to, but I can and want to listen.”
Be patient with the person. Self harm is incredibly complicated. The best support you can be is to be a trusting ear and connect them with resources.
Take care of yourself. It can be hard to learn someone is hurting themselves and you may need support too.

What To Do Next:

Encourage them to work with a therapist.
Explore swapping out this behavior for another less harmful coping strategy. (holding an ice cube, etc.)
Offer resources specific to self harm and recovery!
Continue to be patient as your person continues on their recovery journey. (Do not police their recovery.)

Downloadable Resources:

Resource Cards

In this zip file, you can find resource cards for the United States, the United Kingdom, and the European Union.

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The Things We Don't Say – Identity and Orientation Resource Card

Identity and Orientation is Hope For The Day®’s mental health education and outreach platform that discusses the unique intersection of L.G.B.T.Q+ experiences and mental health.

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Social Media Assets

In this zip file, you can find informational images on how to help, the signs, and understanding your mental health, understanding self harm as well as US/EU/UK resources formatted as both squares and instagram stories.

Download

Tear-off Tab Resource Sheet

In this zip file, you can find our tear off tab resource sheet to put up in your school, community center, or local coffee shop (ask first!) to let people know that IT'S OK NOT TO BE OK.

Download